COLUMBUS, Ohio (WCMH) – The Cincinnati Bengals’ playoff chances improved from 3% to 8% last week. The Cleveland Browns, in the midst of a quarterback switch, could make it zero. Here is a preview of this weekend’s AFC North clash in The Jungle.
Cleveland Browns (3-11) at Cincinnati Bengals (6-8)
Sunday, Dec. 22, at Paycor Stadium, 1 p.m.
Yippee-ki-yay: When Hans Gruber and fellow Die Hard terrorist Theo are discussing logistics in opening the seventh vault to release $640 million of bearer bonds from the Nakatomi Corporation, Gruber says, “It’s Christmas, Theo. It’s the time for miracles.” That’s what the Bengals will need in order to make the NFL playoffs. To be clear, however, the door remains ajar.
For that miracle to happen, the Bengals need the following:
- Win out: Cincinnati hosts Cleveland this weekend, Denver next weekend, then travels to Pittsburgh. There is no wiggle room here. It’s win or stay home in January.
- Denver loses out: The Broncos could have clinched a playoff spot Thursday night, but with the loss to the L.A. Chargers, all eyes are on the Mile High team to lose out. Denver is in Cincinnati in Week 16 then hosts Kansas City in the season finale. On paper, it’s possible Denver falls apart, and in this scenario, the Bengals would hold the head-to-head tiebreaker. It’s also possible the Chiefs, who could clinch a bye in the Wild Card round, rest their starters against the Broncos in Week 18. With the Chargers winning, the Bengals lose a tiebreaker to L.A. based on their crushing loss in Week 11.
- Miami and Indianapolis lose at least one more game: Should the Bengals finish the season tied with either the Dolphins or Colts, they lose the tiebreaker due to conference record. The Dolphins, losers of 12 straight games when the temperature is below 40 degrees, host the 49ers, then travel to Cleveland and New York to face the Jets. The Colts play the Titans at home, the Giants on the road, and return home to host the Jaguars.
Despite an MVP caliber season by Joe Burrow, any scenario that doesn’t include all of the above might bring to mind another Die Hard line, this time from Theo: “Oh my God, the quarterback is toast!”
The Browns will have a new quarterback under center, Dorian Thompson-Robinson, after veteran starter Jameis Winston went 2-5 as a starter Weeks 8 through 15. Winston was a lightning rod of offense through his first four starts, throwing six touchdown passes, including three in an upset win over Baltimore. Other signature performances included a win over the Steelers in which he completed two fourth-down conversions leading to the winning touchdown, and a 497-yard aerial assault – and franchise record – on the Denver Broncos.
The Broncos game, however, is also when the interceptions hit hard. Denver returned two interceptions for touchdowns, including one with less than two minutes remaining to seal the victory. Winston had five more interceptions over the next two weeks, which ultimately led coach Kevin Stefanski to make the switch.
Thompson-Robinson went 1-2 as a starter in 2023 but has just a 51.4 career completion percentage and one touchdown pass vs. seven interceptions.
A win for Cincinnati improves its playoff chances to 11 percent.
Line: Bengals 7 ½. O/U: 46 ½.
Prediction: Theo, for what it’s worth, was the only Die Hard villain to survive. Bengals win 27-12, then hope Argyle doesn’t crash their postseason hopes.